A woman who has been single for four years claims her married colleagues are only adding to her frustrations and making her feel ‘inadequate’ with their ‘judgmental’ attitudes
A woman who claims she is being “single-shamed” by her loved-up work colleagues has admitted to feeling “hopeless” in her bid to navigate life without another half.
In an honest outcry of sorrow on Mumsnet, she said society has left those unattached feeling like there’s “something wrong with them”. Asking how others cope with similar feelings of shame and inadequacy, she penned: “I’ve been really struggling with this for a while. I’m in my early 30s and have been single for four years.”
She continued: “I’ve dated for most of that time (OLD) and had a few 2-3 month relationships. However they have either fizzled out or something has happened to cause me to end it.” She went on to add that the fact she has a “successful career” and her “own place” has only added to her frustrations.
And despite having a “lot of hobbies and a large number of friends” – many of whom are new acquaintances in the same boat – she vented that its “simply not happening” for her. Now, the attitudes of others in the workplace are only making her feel worse.
“I work in an office full of women between the ages of 35-45 so a bit older than me but they all are married and some have kids,” she explained. “They are very judgmental and the type of women who are obsessed with their men (all they talk about).
“I can tell my colleagues especially think less of me for being single. We had work drinks yesterday and I think this has really triggered my feelings of inadequacy here.” The woman added that she doesn’t want for much – all she asks of a man is that he isn’t “abusive or a red flag” but instead “complements” her life.
Closing her post, she confessed: “I’ve started looking into egg freezing as I would like to have a family. I feel like I need to get used to the possibility that I may never meet someone. But I feel so ashamed and like I can’t face the world like this.”
The woman was met with an outpouring of support as other Mumsnet users assured her there is nothing wrong with being single – and, in fact, some of those who have acted cruelly towards her are probably “jealous” of her life. “Stay single if needs be to avoid that and start owning your freedom to others who bang on about their coupledom,” one person said. “I would bet there are few happily marrieds amongst them who will actually be envious of your lifestyle.”
A second added: “I don’t understand why you would be ashamed of not being in a relationship. You just haven’t met any one to be in a relationship with surely. The women you work with are only telling you what they want you to hear, and even if their relationships are great that’s not a reflection on you.”
