An American man who relocated to the UK shared one difficult thing he’s learned about himself that has made him change his behaviour in a particular social setting
Relocating to a different country is exciting but daunting at the same time, as you have to acquaint yourself with unfamiliar customs and traditions. Expats often experience numerous cultural surprises, such as the weather, food and social practices.
Even when two countries share the same language, countless other elements can vary dramatically. Russell relocated from Chicago to Britain and has documented his discoveries about the UK, including our slang, on TikTok. He recently uploaded a clip on the social media platform disclosing something he hadn’t realised about himself until his move to our side of the pond.
The expat explained: “So, [a] hard lesson I learned as an American living in the UK is I really didn’t have manners. I thought I did.”
He then recounted an occasion when he ate out with his girlfriend and the server asked if she could get them any drinks, he stated they would have some water.
Russell’s girlfriend give him a look but he didn’t consider it significant. The server returned to collect the pair’s order and the American told her that he would have a Napoli pizza.
Once they had completed their meal, the server came over to clear their plates and as she left Russell mentioned they would take the bill.
He continued: “It was at this time that I caught my girlfriend staring at me as if I killed somebody and she said ‘that was incredibly rude’.
“I said ‘What do you mean? We’re ready for the bill’ and she said ‘it’s not that, you never said please or thank you’ and it was in that moment I realised that wait staff culture is completely messed up in the US.”
Russell explained that even the kindest and most respectful people in America rarely use “please” or “thank you” in situations where it would be expected.
The American expat suggested that people in the US seem conditioned to interact as if they’re “ordering from robots”.
He called the situation “crazy,” noting in almost any other circumstance, he would have used please and thank you.
Russell continued: “I do it at the grocery store. I do it at the bakery. But for some reason that instincts with wait staff just wasn’t there for me.
“Thankfully I’ve learned the error of my ways, I always say it now. So moral of the story here: if you’re an American thinking of coming to the UK don’t forget to pack your please and thank yous.”
Brits are renowned for their courtesy and even apologising when they don’t need to.
People from the UK can appear more reserved when initially meeting someone while Americans often express politeness through enthusiastic greetings and being overtly welcoming.
