While on the Tube in London recently, my mind drifted off to a place miles away from where I was. A place surrounded by beaches and warm weather, of relaxed people and vibrant atmosphere.
My nostalgia was speaking to me, reminding me of where I grew up for most of my life – Sydney, Australia. This remembrance of an old life only reminded me of the stark contrast between where I was and where I am now, as I as jolted back to reality with the next stop approaching.
Suddenly my mind focused, as the Tube became even more crowded than before, like sardines trapped in a can. The heat produced by so many bodies became almost overbearing, and when I finally got to my destination and exited the station, I was met only with grey clouds and cold winds.
When I looked around, however, no one seemed bothered as they continued on with their day, clearly used to the life before them. It felt like they were all part of a giant collective, rather than all individual people, and I was worried I was assimilated enough at this point to feel as part of that collective.
I’ve fallen victim to becoming too nostalgic many times within the last three years I’ve been living in London, spending that time in Harrow. Often, it’s easy for me to reminisce aged 22.
To daydream about what my life used to be like. I would look through old photos just to grasp that feeling I had back then. Looking at pictures of a younger me, on one of the many beaches that engulfed the coast of Sydney.
Or with people that I used to know, getting up to pointless mischief at my old school. In truth, I had days when I was most certainly homesick. Where I regret my decision to leave Australia and move to the UK permanently
However, the thing with nostalgia is that it can be rooted in an individual’s desire to think the worst of things, to never move on, and to never adapt. I’ve felt as though this was, and still is, my mindset now.
Where I’ll subconsciously compare any aspect of the UK to Australia, even if they have no relevance. In some way I want to justify my nostalgia and justify my feelings of regret. But now, I’ve started to admit how much my life has changed since being here. I’ve gone to university, made bonds with countless people, and started living with the other side of my family that I never knew that well before.
Through this realisations, I grew to appreciate London as a city and the people that live here. There are three key things about London life I’ve come to love.
Firstly, how people form their own communities, secondly how despite the weather, people still go out to catch up with their friends or loved ones.
And thirdly, the diversity of London is something to be celebrated and recognised, much more apparent than Sydney. It made me embrace the idea of being part of this collective, as your individuality can still make you stand out in the heaps of crowds.
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