A mother of five has opened up about the extraordinay lengths she and her husband went to in order to fulfil her dream of having a daughter, after giving birth to four sons in a row
A woman who longed for a daughter took matters into her own hands after her fourth child turned out to be a boy, and very nearly used a method she admits is somewhat “taboo”.
Mum of five Francesca Vigliucci-Bamford had been a football-loving tomboy growing up, who was “happy in male company”. But as time went by, she began to pray for a daughter, with whom she could share the same close bond she enjoyed with her own mother.
Francesca and her firefighter husband, Liam, always knew they wanted children, and went on to welcome sons Aston, LJ, and Rocco. When she became pregnant for the fourth time, however, Francesca admits that she “promptly burst into tears” when the sonographer revealed she was having a little boy.
After the birth of her youngest son, Ace, Francesca, who clarifies that she loves all her boys “fiercely”, decided to take decisive action to ensure she had the daughter she’d been dreaming of.
READ MORE: 10 vintage ‘old lady’ baby names that are making a resurgence this year
In a piece penned for the Mail Online, Francesca shared that she’d previously done everything in her power to have a daughter, from consulting astrology charts to taking cod liver oil tablets, but to no avail. She even opted for ‘the Babydust Method’, which involves carefully planning babymaking sessions according to whether you’d like a boy or a girl.
According to Francesca, Âhaving sex two to three days before ovulation makes conceiving a girl more likely, while having sex “as close to ovulation as possible” boosts the chances of a boy. Although this method is said to have a 78 per cent success rate, it didn’t do the trick for Francesca and Liam.
And so, when trying for baby number five, Francesca opted for gender selection, a process whereby embryos conceived via IVF undergo gender testing before being implanted, allowing parents to select the gender of their choice.
Francesca was well aware that this practice, which is currently illegal in the UK, “is a bit of a taboo subject”, but she felt it was important to give it a go, feeling as though her family just wasn’t complete without her wished-for daughter.
After speaking with a clinic in Cyprus, Francesca learned that she was eligible for the treatment, which cost almost £5,000 before factoring in costs such as accommodation and travel. Francesca also had to undergo fertility tests beforehand, which set her back £850.
As it turns out, however, Francesca didn’t need to fly out for this treatment in the end. She wrote: “Even though I’d opted for gender selection, I was still a member of various Facebook groups about how to ensure your baby’s gender, one of which follows the lunar method. It uses astrology to track our cycles with the moon and pinpoints the right point during the lunar cycle to have sex, depending on whether you want a boy or a girl.
“To be honest, I knew it was probably a load of nonsense, but when I saw that my cycle lined up with the full moon in February, creating an eight-hour window to create a girl, I thought, ‘Why not?’ I called Liam home from work because we had to have sex immediately.”
Two weeks later, Francesca experienced a slight bleed, which she now knows was implantation bleeding. After she missed her period, Francesca and Liam opted to undergo a private blood test to detect any ‘male DNA’, a test that is said to be 99 per cent accurate.
Rebecca recalled: “When the email came back announcing I was having a girl, I had to sit down. I was in utter shock and then cried my eyes out for what seemed like an age. I had longed for a daughter for such a long time, there were moments I’d feared it would never happen. After six years, I couldn’t believe it was true.”
Wanting to make absolutely sure, the couple underwent two additional tests privately, and wept “tears of joy” after it was confirmed that they were indeed having a little girl. Francesca then delightedly emailed the clinic in Cyprus to let them know their services were no longer required.
Penelope, a name Francesca had had her heart set on for nine years, arrived at 38 weeks, with the happy mum crying tears of emotion as she gave birth. But even after welcoming her baby, Francesca still couldn’t quite believe her luck.
She remembered: “Afterwards, I insisted that the midwife verified she really was a girl. Holding my daughter in my arms for the first time was utterly overwhelming, and as a mum, I felt complete. Within five hours of her birth, I’d posted a picture of Penelope across my social media accounts, looking utterly adorable in a pink hat and pink tutu.
“Today, nine months on, Penelope is the light of my life. I’m so pleased to be a ‘girl mum’ at last, and have been thoroughly enjoying myself, dressing her up in beautiful little outfits. Her brothers are obsessed with her. Whenever we’re sitting down to eat or are in the car, I’ll say: ‘Who is the prettiest girl in the world?’ And everyone chimes in: ‘Penelope!’
“As far as I’m concerned, our family is now complete, yet Liam is refusing to have a vasectomy. I say it’s not much to ask, given I have given birth five times, but he says he can’t face having it done. So we’re just being extra careful.
“I feel so happy and extraordinarily blessed. I was delighted with my boys, but having a girl is my absolute dream come true. And while you may judge me for saying so, since having Penelope, I’ve heard from so many other mothers of boys confiding that they secretly wish they’d kept going like I did in order to have their dream daughter, too. I’m just glad that I never gave up.”
Do you have a story to share? Email me at [email protected]
READ MORE: ‘I’m a beauty writer and Boots’ £35 edit is the ultimate introduction to Korean skincare’
