A woman has branded her date ‘petty’ after he demanded she transfer him half the money he spent on their dinner date – after she already offered to pay her share in the restaurant
What happens when you pay the bill can make or break a first date.
When you go on a date, who pays the bill? Whether you’ve gone out for a meal or just for a drink, there’s usually some money exchanged and we all have different views on who should pay. Some believe that one person – usually the man – should foot the expense, while others think that, especially on a first date, the cost should be split evenly between parties.
But one woman has said her recent experience with a date left her so turned off that she isn’t sure if she wants to see him again – all because of how he handled paying the bill.
The woman explained that she went out for sushi on a first date, and prior to arriving at the restaurant, they’d agreed they would split the bill. However, when the woman went to pay for her share, her card declined. She immediately told the waiter that she’d just need to put her PIN in instead of using contactless, but was stopped by her date – who told her “let me just get this, please.”
After the pair went their separate ways, she then got a text from her date demanding that she transfer him the money she should have paid for dinner. In a post on Mumsnet, she said: “I did my half and my card got declined. I said to the waiter, quick as a flash, I’ll need to insert my pin because I’ve probably tapped too many times now.
“The man I was with on the date said, ‘let me just get this, please’, and he tapped. He’s now messaging this evening saying ‘Can you transfer your half? As we did agree to go half. It’s Santander xxx yyy lll’.”
She said the man immediately followed up his request for cash with a link to another date idea asking if she “fancies this next week”. The woman sent him the money that he asked for but hasn’t replied to his second date request because she no longer feels “interested” in him.
“So I have [sent him the money],” the woman continued, “And haven’t replied back to say it’s done. [Am I being unreasonable] to not be interested now? Just seems a bit petty. I personally would’ve just left it if the shoe was on the other foot.”
Commenters on the post were largely on the woman’s side, as they claimed that if he told her in the restaurant that he would “get this” instead of letting her pay, that indicated he was happy to foot the entire bill. One person said: “He made himself look generous in front of the waiter then went back on it later. I don’t like stingy men. You said you were going to enter your PIN to pay your half so why did he bother saying he’d pay when that wasn’t his intention?”
Another added: “He sounds like one of those men that likes to be seen by other people to do the nice thing but is different behind closed doors.” And a third posted: “It’s the fact he wanted to be the Big Man Who Pays to the waiter – but not to you!”
However, other commenters said they would give the man another chance, as it could have been a misunderstanding and he never meant to suggest that he would pay for the entire meal – especially as they’d already agreed to split it.
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