A woman is seeking advice after sharing how her multimillionaire husband still charges her rent every month despite being married for six years and together for 18 – making her question their entire relationship
A woman has sparked a debate after sharing how her multimillionaire husband still charges her rent every month despite being together for 18 years. The 47-year-old explained how she lived with her husband, 50, for 12 years before marrying him six years ago – and they have decided to stay child-free.
But while he spends his retirement on the golf course, she is “in a dark room by herself bent over a laptop working”. Venting on Reddit, she said: “Despite his massive inheritance, my husband still charges me a monthly rent and bills me for every tiny expense. I have a modest amount of savings (around $250k[£195k]), but they are largely tied up in my 401k [a retirement account], so can’t afford to retire anytime soon.
“I work 40+ hours a week, while hubby stays home and indulges in expensive hobbies like golf and sailing, and takes long trips without me. Is it unreasonable of me to expect him to share his good financial luck with me?”
She went on to explain how her husband made her sign an extensive pre-nup before their marriage after having “bad experiences dating women”, who he claims were only with him for his money. She added: “We agreed to always split expenses 50/50, and to never share finances. We lived quite happily in rented properties for most of our relationship, splitting the rent, gas, internet, etc., my share of which came to around $1200 (£938).”
But four years ago, their lives changed dramatically when his mum passed away unexpectedly, leaving him with a £8 million inheritance. “We moved into our fancy new house, and as the first of the month approached, I (foolishly) assumed that my ‘bill’ would be smaller, now we had no more rent to pay,” she added.
“But instead, my husband told me that due to higher utilities and property taxes, my payment to him each month would now be higher, to the tune of $1800[£1,408]/month. This is a below-average rent price in our area (believe me, I did my research after our discussion!), so I kind of shrugged and accepted this. After all, I was now making $80k[£63]/year and could afford it.”
But after the Covid pandemic hit, she realised that her husband spent his days in retirement – rarely raising before 11am, followed by golf – and ‘leaving out’ his wife. Unhappy with how their relationship has turned out, she is now considering leaving her husband to find a partner with a similar financial level as her own.
She said: “I have tried so hard over the years to be a good partner. I want our marriage to work, but I’m at a loss over how to process my feelings about this. I feel misled over the purchase of our house; I also feel like an idiot for not insisting I was added to the deed before my husband purchased it.”
Seeking advice, she says she wishes she could return to her ‘old life’ before he inherited his mum’s money as their relationship was much easier back then. She added: “I guess my biggest fear is that once I’ve brought up the subject, I can’t “put the cat back in the box”, and he’ll think I just want his money and it will cause us to break up.”
While most users urged her to speak openly and honestly with her husband, others shared how they handle financial differences in their own relationships. One user said: “I was well off when I met my wife. On the day we got married, I gave her equal access to everything. Had I not done that, I would be forever uncomfortable with the power dynamic.
“In the 11 years we have been married, she has been nothing but respectful and responsible with our money. People here give me s*** all the time when I talk about my decision, but it was mine to make I am absolutely comfortable with it. For the record, my wife didn’t actually know how well I was doing when we got married.
“She never asked and I didn’t live ‘rich’. I am a jeans and T-shirt guy who was driving a truck at the time. I made my money in the software industry and retired a few years after we were married.” Another user added: “I mean I can see him keeping his assets since you guys signed a prenup and it made a lot of sense.
“Charging your wife’s rent because you paid for a house in cash is kinda f*****. I wouldn’t charge my wife rent, I can see you still working because you’re 47 and have no kids so like why not? But it should be your choice Your husband is having his cake and eating it too.”
