A brother has shared his fury after his parents have repeatedly asked him to pay for his sister’s wedding – from the dress to the engagement party – but his last straw came when he was asked to fund the honeymoon
A man has been “scolded” by his family after being asked to pay for his sister’s expensive wedding costs by his parents.
It’s no secret that getting married can be an expensive affair. From venue costs, to flowers, invitations, a wedding dress, suits, cake, travel, plus potential extras, the big day bill can soon rack up.
People who propose to their partners often spend months saving for an engagement ring, only to be met with further costs for the wedding. While it is an old-fashioned tradition for the father of the bride to pay for the wedding, nowadays many couple’s pay for their own wedding or a number of relatives may help out.
One man, who wishes to remain unnamed, has shared his frustrating after he was left gobsmacked when his parents insisted that he pays for his sister’s wedding. The 32-year-old man claims that his parents began planning their daughter’s wedding as soon as she got engaged from her partner of two years – but it is “far beyond what they can afford”.
The brother believes that his parents have “always spoiled” his sister with “frequent shopping sprees, a new car at 16, and a fully funded college tuition”. Meanwhile he claims he starting working after leaving education, “saved diligently”, and owns a small, but successful business.
He added that his parents “haven’t been great with money” and have “always lived beyond their means”. So, when it came to his mum and dad planning his sister’s engagement party they asked if he could help, then proceeded to ask if he could “chip in for the dress”, and noted that they needed a deposit for the wedding venue.
“I don’t mind helping family, but this situation has gone too far,” he said. The brother added: “I sat down with them and explained that while I’m doing well financially, I’m not made of money, and I have my own expenses and future to think about.
“They brushed it off, saying it’s my duty to help family, especially my sister. They even suggested I take out a loan if necessary. The last straw was when they asked me to pay for the honeymoon. I put my foot down and told them I’m done funding the wedding.”
The annoyed man says his family were “furious” by his reaction – reportedly accusing him of being “selfish and ungrateful”. He continued: “My parents are now telling everyone in our extended family that I’m refusing to help my sister in her time of need, and I’m getting a lot of backlash.
“Some relatives have called to scold me, while others are staying out of it. I’m starting to feel guilty, but at the same time, I think it’s unfair to expect me to bankroll such an extravagant event.”
Over 1,000 people reacted to the dilemma. One individual said: “Yes, ‘family comes first’ but you are part of that family and they most definitely are not putting you first. You have been extremely generous and they are taking advantage of you.
“I wouldn’t give a single cent more (ever) and if others come at you for it, maybe have the numbers ready of what you’ve given them up to this point.” Another boldly advised: “I would actually post an excel spreadsheet of what I’ve paid to date. I would bet once people see what’s been paid for already they’ll see that [your sister] is spoiled and entitled.
“Then I’d cut them off, even if they get over it, they’ll only see me as a walking wallet going forward.” Another commented: “If it’s possible to get refunds for some of the things you’ve already put deposits on I would do so. You’re the brides brother not a cash machine.”
One other wrote: “This isn’t your responsibility. Tell your parents and sister that they themselves can take out a loan. That, or they can start planning within a realistic budget that doesn’t rely on you.”
Do you agree? Share your thoughts in the comments below.
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